Day 20: One thing you would change now

If you could go back and change anything from your life, would you?

What would you change?

There are a few things I would do differently. Some of them I’m not going to talk about here because they’re private.

Yet, at the same time, what else would change — what unintended consequences would there be?

I’d change some of my interactions with other people over the years… I’d try to not cause hurt where I’ve caused hurt.

But if I did change my behaviour, if I went back and did that, would I have learned the lessons I needed to learn to become who I am now?

What if I went on to cause even greater hurt, because I hadn’t learned or changed?

It’s a tough one.

So here’s a practical one: I would change buying my flat.

When I got divorced about a thousand years ago, I was fixated — obsessed — with buying my own place. I get it; I needed that security as my life was crumbling.

But I bought at the most expensive time, and it’s been a weight on my shoulders ever since because I can’t really afford to sell (plus there’s all sorts of shared-ownership legal nonsense making it difficult).

And yet, it’s kind of a comfort to have it there in the background, in case we ever need it.

So maybe I wouldn’t.

Maybe I wouldn’t change much at all.

How about you?

Set a timer for 5 minutes and write.



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Notes in the Margin

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About the Author Vicky Fraser