Don’t rely on your friends

​Guess what? Your friends and family probably won't pull out their wallets for your book.

Why should they?

I write this with no bitterness – or, at least, I don't feel scratchy about it anymore.

A few years ago, I'd feel terribly affronted and hurt when the people I love, and who love me, didn't jump to grab a copy of my new book. After all, if you can't rely on your friends and family, who can you rely on?

Until I realised something: it's not anybody else's job to make my book a success.

Creating expectations in my own head about how the people around me should behave is both unfair to them and sets myself up for disappointment and scratchy bitterness.

Not to mention the fact that most of my family and many of my friends are not my target audience. And the ones who are are under no obligation to buy the damn thing.

I thought I'd share this because when you've finished your book, you'll be so excited and proud.

You'll want to run naked through the streets waving your book and your bits for all to see – and you'll thrill with excitement every time an order comes through.

And, if you're anything like me, you may feel a little pang every time the order is not from someone you might expect to buy it.

I don't want you to be disappointed – and I don't want you to develop the mindset that snuck into my brain: that somehow other people should support me.


That's not how this works.

It's up to us to persuade the right people that our books are worth investing in.

Nobody else is going to do it for us – and that's a really cool position to be in because it means we're in charge of our own destiny. We get to make our own successes (and failures) without relying on (or blaming) others.

If you can build that into who you are, you will be powerful indeed. Much more powerful than most.

And on today of all days (in the rain-sodden UK at least) that's deeply important.

Remember: just because your friends and family don't buy your book it doesn't mean they're not proud of you. They are. They support you in other ways, which are more valuable long-term than shelling out a few quid for a book they may not really be interested in (in the nicest possible way).

Now that's out of the way, get busy finding the right people for your book – and offer it to them in a way that makes them go "ooooo. Yes please."

p.s. I'll be covering exactly how to find the right people – and more – in my Moxie Book Kickstarter, which starts on January 13. There'll be a live webinar each Monday for 5 weeks, covering a different topic to get you started, and a live Q&A session at the end to wrap everything up. By the time the Kickstarter has finished, you'll be ready to write your book.

This is the first time I've run this, so if you want in, you get to join us for just £149 + VAT. Click here if you're interested and I'll add you to the list.

p.p.s Not quite ready for the kickstarter course? Grab a copy of my book How The Hell Do You Write a book below instead ⬇⬇

Start Writing Your Book Today

If you want to learn more about how to write, self-publish, and market a book for your business, snaffle yourself a copy of How The Hell Do You Write A Book? Then check out the blog and podcast for more articles and guides. If you want a little (or a lot) more help, find out how you can work with me.

About Vicky...

Vicky Fraser is the founder of Moxie Books and author of How The Hell Do You Write A Book and Business For Superheroes. She helps business owners write life-changing books, connect with readers and new customers, and grow their businesses. When she's not doing that, she's hanging from a trapeze by her feet.

About the Author Vicky Fraser